Our Earth, Which Art on Earth, Green Be Thy Name

Rick Santorum, champion of all things Christian (except for tolerance, forgiveness, loving thy fellow man, and a litany of other things commanded in the Bible), has called global warming a pseudo-religion!
Shit, he's figured us out.  Our secret cult with hidden rituals of recycling and planting vegetable gardens has been found out! Quick, everybody hide your recycle bins or at least cover the Symbol of the Holy Tri-Arrow.  Maybe if you hang trucknuts on the Prius, they won't know that it's a hybrid.  Oh, and dear God of all that is environmentally friendly, don't use re-usable shopping totes!  Maybe if we just keep re-using the crappy plastic bags, they won't notice what we're doing.
Wait!  Hold on, if it's a pseudo-religion, don't we have rights?  If we worship at the farmer's markets on Saturdays, shouldn't those be tax exempt or something?  We do our recycling on Wednesdays around here, so if that's our holy day, I don't want to go to work.  If you, Rick Santorum, get to imply that we should all follow YOUR religious views, why aren't we allowed to imply the same?  This country was not founded on Catholicism any more than it was founded on our most holy of churches, the Order of People Who Don't Want To Fuck Up The Earth.
Thankfully, global warming is not a church, nor is it an ideology.  It is something that an overwhelming majority of scientists, including those who work for oil companies, agree as a scientific finding supported by significant evidence.
And another thing, oh lord of the sweater vests; If you're trying to insult something by calling it a religion, you're sort of undermining your entire platform.  Just sayin'.


Sources: http://www.redstate.com/rjsantorum/2012/03/10/blown-and-tossed-by-the-winds-of-political-correctness/; http://www.prisonplanet.com/oil-companies-support-global-warming-alarmists-not-skeptics.html;  http://motherjones.com/blue-marble/2012/03/santorum-my-opponents-believe-pseudo-religion-global-warming

Thank You, Republican Presidential Candidates!

No matter how bad my day is, I can always look to the Republican Presidential nominees for a good laugh.

In 2008, Rick Santorum alleged that Satan was attacking America: http://www.cbsnews.com/8301-503544_162-57382008-503544/santorum-in-08-satan-is-attacking-america/

Mitt Romney accidentally admits, with his typical awkward speaking skills, that austerity kills jobs: http://thinkprogress.org/economy/2012/02/21/429831/romney-admits-budget-cuts-slow-economy/

Rick Santorum knows almost nothing about American history, specifically about the development of public schools: http://crooksandliars.com/blue-texan/rick-santorum-flunks-basic-history-agai

Most musicians don't want Republicans to use their music as part of a campaign, but Obama has a Spotify playlist of songs by artists that support him: http://abcnews.go.com/blogs/politics/2012/02/the-obama-album/

Newt Gingrich.  Seriously, Newt Gingrich.  He alleges that gas was $2/gallon when Obama was elected, meaning that he thinks that Obama was elected sometime during Clinton's presidency: http://abcnews.go.com/US/wireStory/gingrich-policies-lower-gas-prices-15754351#.T0QrcZggs6R

Then I remember that any one of these men may one day be our president, and I stop laughing.